A child arrangements order sets out with whom a child should live and spend time with or otherwise have contact with any other person. The parent the child does not live with is referred to as the non-resident parent, and as such, will only be able to see their child in accordance with the child arrangements order in place or by agreement with the other parent.

A foundational concept is parental responsibility (PR). If a non-resident parent holds PR, they are legally empowered to have a say in key decisions about a child’s life—such as education, health care, religion, and residence. Without PR, their legal standing is weaker (though they still have an obligation to pay child maintenance).

How a non-resident parent obtains PR (if not already acquired) is crucial:

  • Automatic acquisition: In England and Wales, a father automatically has PR if married to the mother at the time of the child’s birth, or (if unmarried) is named on the birth certificate (since 1 December 2003 for births in England and Wales).
  • Parental Responsibility Agreement: The mother and father (or other holder of PR) can enter into a written agreement, registered with the court, granting PR to the non-resident parent.
  • Parental Responsibility Order: If no agreement is possible, a non-resident parent may apply to the court for a PR Order. The court will grant it only if it is in the child’s best interests.
  • By virtue of a Child Arrangements Order: Sometimes, through a residence or child arrangements order, PR is conferred.

A parent who later acquires parental responsibility does not lose any rights over their child, and their rights and responsibilities towards their child become equal to those of a married father. This includes the right to be involved in important decisions about the child’s life.

It is crucial that unmarried fathers who wish to play an active role in their child’s life take the necessary steps to secure their parental responsibility. This legal standing not only serves as a tool for ensuring participation in key decisions, but also lays a foundation for nurturing the parent-child relationship.

The limits of parental responsibility

Having parental responsibility does not automatically mean you have the right to see your child if they do not live with you. But if a dispute arises, it is presumed that the involvement of a parent in a child’s life will further its welfare. If a resident parent refuses a non-resident parent access to their child, they can apply to the court for a child arrangements order setting out how and when contact takes place.

It is also worth mentioning that if you have parental responsibility, this is a shared right, with neither parent having priority over the other. This means that if one parent wishes to pursue a particular course of action, such as vaccinating or not vaccinating a child, where the other disagrees, then an application to the court will need to be made to decide the issue.

Parental responsibility ends when the child reaches 18, but it can also be revoked by a court order, although this is extremely rare.

A key right for non-resident parents is to have meaningful contact with their child, including time in person, overnights, holidays, or indirect contact (calls, video). However, legally speaking, there is no automatic “right” of contact—the entitlement is more properly framed as a right in aid of the child’s welfare.

Seeking legal remedies

In cases where a non-resident parent feels their rights are being ignored by the resident parent, they can make an application to the court for a range of orders. These are:

  • Specific issue order – this is an order asking the family court to look at a specific question relating to the child’s upbringing, such as a change of school or surname
  • Prohibited steps order – this prevents a parent from carrying out a certain action or making decisions about their child. Examples include: consenting to a child undergoing a certain medical procedure or treatment, or moving with the child overseas
  • Child Arrangements Order — specifying contact – to formalise contact, a non-resident parent may apply for a Child Arrangements Order (CAO), asking the court to specify the time the child spends with each parent. The court may order that the child “spends time with” or “stays with” the non-resident parent.

In doing so, the court considers:

  • The child’s wishes and feelings, in light of their age and understanding
  • The child’s needs (emotional, educational, health, stability)
  • The likely effect of any proposed change in arrangements
  • The capability of each parent to meet the child’s needs
  • The existing relationship and continuity
  • The safeguarding concerns: protection from harm

In practice, the court does not presume that equal time is always the ideal; arrangements are tailored to fit circumstances. Even if 50/50 shared care is feasible, it may not suit school location, parental work patterns, or other practicalities.

If a non-resident parent is denied contact by the resident parent (and there is no agreement), the CAO is the primary route by which the non-resident parent can press their claim.

Enforcing and varying contact orders

If a contact order exists and the resident parent fails to comply, the non-resident parent can apply to vary (change) or enforce the order. The court may impose remedies such as penalties or revised arrangements.

If circumstances change (e.g. the non-resident parent moves region, health issues, change in child’s schooling or welfare), that parent may ask the court to vary the existing child arrangements order.

Residence / living arrangements

Although non-resident parents, by definition, do not have the child living with them most of the time, they can still apply to change the residence arrangements if circumstances justify it.

If both parents agree that the child should spend more time (even full-time) with the non-resident parent, the existing CAO can be varied accordingly. If there is no agreement, the non-resident parent may apply for variation of the order (or for a new one) to change who the child lives with.

Schooling

A parent with parental responsibility has the right to be kept informed by their child’s school. Most schools, especially primary schools, have specific policies/guidance on their websites regarding their responsibilities towards non-resident parents. This generally includes things such as obtaining consent for school trips and medical treatment, safeguarding, information sharing, and dealing with court orders.

Entitlements of non-resident parents with parental responsibility typically tend to include:

  • Attending parents meetings
  • Expressing a preference when choosing a school
  • Standing for election or to vote as a parent governor
  • To be notified of their right to appeal against a child’s exclusion
  • To receive information on the child’s education, such as copies of reports, photograph orders, letters regarding shows/performances/assemblies, and letters regarding whole school events such as a summer fete.
  • To initiate or be involved in the procedure for obtaining an Education Health and Care Plan for the child.

Any disputes that arise with the resident parent as a consequence of such entitlements must be resolved between the parents, and if necessary, by involving the court.

International and cross-border issues

If a non-resident parent lives abroad, or if a child is taken abroad, further rights and constraints arise.

  • Taking a child abroad: If there is a CAO, the resident parent may take the child abroad for up to 28 days without needing further consent from the non-resident parent (unless the order explicitly prohibits it). Otherwise, written consent from all PR holders (or a court order) is usually required. Taking a child abroad without such consent can amount to child abduction.
  • Jurisdiction and recognition: Since leaving the EU, rules on mutual recognition and enforcement of judgments have changed. For UK–EU cases, specific guidance governs which country’s courts should handle disputes, and how orders are enforced.
  • Habitual residence: The concept of habitual residence is crucial when children move across jurisdictions. Courts examine where the child is habitually resident to decide jurisdiction. A landmark Supreme Court case (Re B) held that a child cannot lose habitual residence except in truly exceptional circumstances.
  • Enforcement abroad: For non-resident parents outside the UK, obtaining and enforcing CAOs or contact orders across borders may involve international treaties (e.g. the Hague Convention) or bilateral arrangements depending on the state.

Children’s wishes, age, and autonomy

A recurrent theme in cases is the weight courts attach to children’s preferences. But there is no fixed age at which a child can refuse contact or decide with whom to live.

  • Courts may start to place more weight on a child’s views from about ages 12–13 onward, but this depends on maturity and the ability to understand consequences.
  • Ultimately, the court’s decision rests on best interests, not on any absolute entitlement of a child to refuse contact.
  • Once a child reaches 16, they may choose where to live—unless a CAO binds the arrangement until 17 or 18.

In practice, courts try to balance respecting older children’s views with protecting their welfare, sometimes appointing children’s guardians or ordering CAFCASS or social service assessments to assist in determining what is in the child’s best interests.

Limitations, risks and strategic considerations

While non-resident parents have legal tools at their disposal, in practice there are constraints and pitfalls:

  • Delay and cost: Court proceedings can be long and expensive. Even obtaining PR or a CAO may take months. Many cases begin with mediation or negotiation (often obligatory before applying to court).
  • Court discretion: The court may refuse contact or restrict it if there is evidence of harm (emotional, physical, abuse) or ongoing conflict that undermines the child’s wellbeing.
  • Best interest standard: Rights are not absolute. Even with PR and a CAO, the welfare of the child is paramount.
  • Change over time: As children mature, their routines, schooling, social life, and needs evolve, so existing arrangements may require variation.