Our Surrey Consultant, Lewis Hulatt of Major Family Law, the best divorce and children law specialist, says:
Well, the day happened and my long-single friend finally got married last weekend. In marrying, he has taken on the responsibility of step-children, all of whom appeared happy enough about it all. So they start a new life as a family and my long-term advice was ‘keep communicating’.
The day involved a lot of blog-worthy conversations – even with a couple of other lawyers.
One particular conversation confirmed that it is better for family law solicitors to recommend somebody that they trust to do a good job, rather than represent people they know well. Many years ago, I went away with a group of people, one of whom tried to recruit me to threaten her husband with losing his son if they ever parted. My observations at the time were that the son was actually more at ease with his father than his mother and let her know that being the main parent was no foregone conclusion. I didn’t see her much after that… As everybody predicted, they did separate, but even after an unpleasant divorce, he was still able to take the view that his son’s home environment was more important that mathematical fairness. ‘Money isn’t everything’ he told me, which is just as well, as his lawyer – recommended by somebody else – didn’t seem to have got him a particularly good bargain. Clients may all be equal before the law, but not all lawyers devise good deals.
What was particularly good to see was how few of the couples I knew had separated or divorced – almost all the couples who were together even thirty years before, were still in tolerable (or better) relationships with the same person! Some may never have married, despite long committed partnerships, but apart from those parted by death it was almost a clean sweep of people together after 10, 20 or 30 years.
It may not be good for business to have couples stay together, but as the guy said ‘money isn’t everything’.
The lawyers at Major Family Law are independent and will use their experience on your behalf to look for fair outcomes.